The "American Dream" Isn't Dead—It Just Moved Out

For most Americans, financial security is further out of reach than ever. In episode 22 of the podcast, I sat down with Craig Carlson, author of Pancakes in Paris, to discuss his experience of living the American Dream in Paris.

You've heard the phrase your entire life: "The American Dream." Work hard. Stay out of trouble. Be loyal to your employer. Play the game. And one day, you'll own a home, raise a family, and enjoy some level of financial freedom.

That version of the dream no longer exists, at least within the borders of America.

If you want a shot at building the kind of life our parents once called middle class, you'll have to seek it elsewhere. (Or make a f*ck ton of money)

The Economics Are Brutal and Getting Worse

A January 2025 report from Yahoo Finance found that in 50 U.S. cities, earning $200,000 per year now qualifies as middle class, not rich, not elite, just average in terms of economic stability and lifestyle expectations (Yahoo Finance).

Here's the problem: only 12.4% of U.S. households earn that much. The percentage is even lower for individual workers (U.S. Census Bureau). Meanwhile, the median personal income in the United States is $56,420, according to the latest data.

So, to recap for dramatic effect: in 50 U.S. cities, many of which are major job centers, you now need to earn $200,000 just to be considered middle class. Meanwhile, the median income in America is $56,420. Median means middle. That is a $143,580 gap between what qualifies as average in today's economy and what most people earn.

This means that the vast majority of Americans are being priced out of what used to be considered the average.

Let's break it down:

• Housing: In mid-sized cities like Denver or Seattle, a one-bedroom rental averages $2,000 per month. A mortgage easily tops $3,000.

• Healthcare: Premiums for a family can reach $20,000 per year, with additional out-of-pocket costs ranging from $2,000 to $4,000.

• Groceries: $800–$1,000 per month for a family.

• Childcare: $10,000–$20,000 annually, per child.

• Transportation: $8,500 annually if you own a car. This is America, where there is no public transit, so you have to own a car.

• Taxes: A $200,000 salary comes with $50,000+ in taxes, depending on your state.

  
  

All in, a basic middle-class life in the U.S. today costs between $120,000 and $180,000 per year, conservatively. And that's before you save a single dollar for retirement.

So when you hear people say "Just hustle harder," ask them to do the math.

Millennials: The First Generation Falling Behind

We've heard it over and over: millennials are more educated than previous generations. But what did it cost?

Crushing student debt. Higher housing prices. Stagnant wages.

According to data from the Urban Institute, Brookings, and USAFacts, millennials have accumulated significantly less wealth, are less likely to own homes, and are reaching major financial milestones later than previous generations. Millennials have 8.4% lower homeownership rates than Boomers and 8% lower than Gen X at the same age. Even as average household incomes have risen, research shows that the cost of essentials—housing, healthcare, and education—has far outpaced those income gains, leaving millennials with 22% less wealth than Gen Xers had at the same point in life. Retirement readiness is also lagging, as many remain burdened by student debt and rising living costs.

Even when millennials do everything right, they're still behind.

And yet we're still sold the lie that "working harder" is the key. It's not. The system is broken.

Craig's Story: Upward Mobility Abroad

Craig Carlson grew up in Frenchtown, Connecticut. He didn't come from money. He didn't have a safety net. But he aspired for more. He knew he was capable of it, but his environment wasn't suited for his ambitions.

He was 38 years old, in debt, and had never run a restaurant. But he raised $100,000 from friends, secured a loan from a French bank, and launched Breakfast in America in 2003.

More than 20 years later, his diners are still thriving. He lives part-time in France, part-time in the U.S. The subtitle of his bestselling memoir says it all: Pancakes in Paris: Living the American Dream in France. Which begs the question: why did he have to go to France to live the "American Dream," and that's what I hope this article addresses.

Here's what stood out in our conversation:

• Upward mobility was possible in France. His background didn't disqualify him. Unlike here in America, so much of your future is determined by your socioeconomic class.

• Healthcare and education weren't profit centers. His husband got a graduate degree for a few hundred euros. Compare that to six figures here. (Suffocating student loan debt)

• Even fast food workers in France receive 5–6 weeks of paid vacation. No PTO requests. It's guaranteed by law. In the U.S., even in high-paying roles, it's common to start with just two weeks of PTO, regardless of education or experience. We are adults; we should be treated like adults, and our work product should earn us the time to live life.

  
  

Craig built his dream abroad that he couldn't have built in the United States.

I've Seen It Too

During my time abroad, mainly in Spain and Portugal, I've stayed in city-center hotels for around $100 per night. That same hotel in any major U.S. city would easily cost between $300 and $500. I've bought fresh bread, vegetables, and wine from corner stores for a fraction of what Whole Foods charges here. Better quality as well. And I've watched people take time to live. Imagine that, living. Work also exists abroad, but it's not the centerpiece of life. And that changes everything. When you live in a system that doesn't punish you for getting sick, one that gives you space to breathe, treats leisure as a right rather than a reward, you start to realize: maybe life doesn't have to be this hard. Perhaps we've just accepted it too easily.

Here's some rapid-fire facts: Americans work more hours than almost anyone in the developed world, but rank 28th in work-life balance (OECD). We spend more on healthcare than any other country, and still die younger; life expectancy in the U.S. is over 4 years shorter than the European average (Peterson-KFF). The U.S. has reached its lowest-ever ranking on the World Happiness Index (24th) (WHR), while Nordic countries dominate the top five. Only 8% of kids born into poverty here make it to the top. In Denmark? 15%. (Pew Economic Mobility Project) Across nearly every metric, health, mobility, well-being, and time off, Europe outperforms the USA.

The "American Dream" Isn't Dead—It Just Moved Out

The rules in the U.S. have changed. The things we once thought were achievable, such as homeownership, affordable childcare, and financial stability, have become luxury items. Meanwhile, other countries have figured out how to provide them without demanding your soul in return.

The "American Dream" still exists. You might have to cross an ocean to find it.

🎙 Want to hear more? Check out my whole conversation with Craig Carlson on The Randall Osché Podcast—available on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify.